Young children often share far more of themselves when an adult asks a warm, open question and then simply waits. There is no need to rush, correct or tidy up their answers — the aim is to understand your child a little better, not to test them. These seventeen questions are gentle conversation starters you can return to again and again, at whatever pace suits your family.
You do not need to ask all seventeen at once. One meaningful question, asked with genuine curiosity, can open up a lovely conversation on its own. There are no right or wrong answers here, and your child’s reply may surprise you. Try them during everyday moments — over a meal, on the way home, during quiet play or at bedtime — and adapt the wording to suit your child’s age.
Best suited for
Nursery 2, Kindergarten 1 and Kindergarten 2 — and some Nursery 1 children, using the simpler wording suggested near the end of this article.
Everyday discovery
These questions invite your child to notice and describe the small moments of their day.
- What was the most interesting thing you discovered today?
- What is the first thing you like to do after waking up?
- When do you feel happiest?
- What was the best part of your day?
Memories and experiences
Children hold on to memories in their own way. Give them time to think — a pause is part of the conversation.
- What is your earliest memory?
- Is there something many people like, but you do not?
- What is something you would like to remember for a long time?
Imagination and ideas
Open questions like these give imaginative answers room to grow. Accept surprising replies with interest rather than correction.
- If you wrote a book, what would it be about?
- If you could teach me something, what would you teach me?
- What do you think is the best job in the world?
- Would you rather be a student or a teacher? Why?
Favourite things
Favourites are an easy, friendly place to begin, and they often lead somewhere unexpected.
- What is your favourite place?
- What is your favourite book?
- What is your favourite song?
- What is your favourite celebration or festival?
Identity and strengths
These final questions help a child notice what makes them, them. They also gently build a young child’s growing sense of self.
- What do you like most about yourself?
- What strength would you like a new friend to know about? You might follow this with a warm, related question: What makes you feel most proud of yourself?
The pride question is a lovely follow-up rather than a separate item on the list. Offered after your child has answered, it invites them to reflect a little more deeply — but only if the conversation is flowing naturally.
How to use these questions at home
A few small habits make these conversations feel easy rather than like an interview:
- Ask just one or two questions at a time, and let the rest wait for another day.
- Give your child thinking time. Silence often means they are working out a thoughtful answer.
- Follow your child’s interests. If one question sparks something, stay with it.
- Try “Tell me more” instead of moving straight on to the next question.
- Share your own answer after your child has spoken, so they lead the conversation.
- Return to the same question in a few months — children’s answers change beautifully as they grow.
- Respect answers that differ from what you expected. The point is to understand your child, not to reach a “correct” reply.
The same gentle, unhurried spirit sits behind the way children learn to manage feelings and setbacks; you can read more about that in our guide to how preschool helps build emotional resilience.
Simpler wording for younger children
For Nursery 1 children, or on days when a shorter question suits better, you might try:
- What made you happy today?
- Which book do you like?
- What are you good at?
- What would you like to teach me?
Questions like these are quietly powerful. They tell your child that their thoughts matter, that being listened to feels good, and that home is a place where they can think out loud. These are the very habits of mind — curiosity, reflection and confidence — that will serve them well in a fast-changing world, a theme we explore in why happiness alone will not prepare children for an AI future.
A closing thought
Getting to know your child is not a single conversation but an unfolding one. Ask gently, listen fully, and let their answers lead the way. Some days you may learn something new; other days you may simply enjoy each other’s company. Both are worth having.
